This COVID-19 crisis has radically changed our lives. Just a few months ago, we had no idea our 'world' would be confined to our homes! This crisis is a powerful reminder of how important freedom is - and how much we need human connection!
Remember, you are not alone. Because what is DIFFERENT here is that everyone is impacted! Your neighbor, mom, boss, friends, and counterparts around the world are going through something similar.
So, it's important to remember:
"Stay in the center of the circle and let things take their course," Tae Te Ching.
Staying centered is the challenge each of us must rise to! If we're going to Shelter in place, we may as well make the most of it.
Here Are 11 Things You Can do to Make Your Life Better while Physically Isolated:
1) Create a Healthy, Supportive Routine
When we feel powerless or helpless (as so many of us do at the moment), one straightforward thing to do is to create a routine or schedule.
While we're all stuck in anxiously waiting at home, it's easy to lose our sense of time. Days can begin to blend into each other. A routine can give us an anchor and a greater sense of control over our lives. And if you have children, creating structure is especially important to provide them with a sense of normality.
This routine or schedule can be as simple as:
7 am - Wake-up
8 am - Breakfast
10 am - Exercise
11 am - Talk to friends
12.00pm - Lunch
1-4 pm - Learning or a home project
5 pm - Make & Eat Dinner
7 pm - Talk to close family
8 pm - Reading, Journaling
10 pm - Bed
Be sure to include food preparation, social time, exercise and outdoor time, and some learning or creativity. Hence, you get some benefit from this challenging time.
It's also essential to recognize weekends because it's too easy for weeks to blur together. So, make a looser schedule for your weekends. For example, you could include:
Sleeping in/later bedtime
Movie night with popcorn
A virtual happy hour with friends or colleagues
Consider a larger project, perhaps some art, craft, gardening, or home redecoration that will allow you to relax and create a sense of calmness for you and your family.
So, create a routine for a sense of control and mastery over your environment and life circumstances. Reclaim what power you can over your own life. With all this uncertainty, it's crucial for you - and especially necessary for children - to have predictability.
2) Build Your Physical Strength, Fitness Levels, or Flexibility!
Building your physical strength is powerful and health-boosting! Physical strength and flexibility are life-affirming, good for our health, but feeling physically robust increases our sense of empowerment and decreases our feelings of helplessness too!
So, add some physical activity into your schedule - as little as 15 minutes daily. Maybe by the end of this you'll be fitter or even be able to do 10 (or 100!) sit-ups!
There are many options to boost your physical strength and health. Here are some ideas:
Take up a yoga practice - excellent for strength-building, flexibility - and calm! There are lots of online options. Here is one with everything from 10 minutes for beginners to advanced practice. Sarah Beth Yoga on YouTube has more (free) yoga videos than I can count.
Learn to do a press-up or push-up. Then see if you can get to 10 (or more - depending on where you start)!
There are so many online fitness classes on YouTube - for beginners, experts - with equipment and also with no equipment whatsoever. PopSugar Fitness has many options so you can find the right program for you.
REMEMBER: Being stronger = FEELING stronger and more in control! And building your PHYSICAL strength or fitness = REDUCED feelings of helplessness!
3) Explore your Life Vision:
Rather than watching endless news streams, you can choose to focus on a bigger picture - your future. What do you want for the rest of your life? What would you be disappointed you did NOT do? Where do you envision yourself in 10 years?
Having a clear vision of how you want your life to be is a powerful motivator. A vision helps us work towards our goals, take action, and make a change. Soon, we'll all be super-busy again - and a vision might be just what you need to stay focused!
Here are 5 questions to ponder or journal around to go deeper:
What do you desire or yearn for in your life?
How do you want to feel?
What do you really, really want to be different in your life?
What would have happened in 3 years’ time such that your life is spectacular, and you feel magnificent about yourself?
What's your dream for this lifetime? Imagine you're 90 years old and looking back over your life; what did you do that made you proud and happy?
TIP: Remember to think possibility, not probability! Don't limit yourself and your ideas because you don't believe something is likely. Instead, believe it's possible - and even if you don't get all the way there, you may get close - or even find something better along the way!
Struggling with finding your purpose or feeling stuck? I can help you with that. I offer a 45-minute complimentary session to learn how coaching can assist you to live the life you want on your terms. You can schedule it here: https://rb.gy/jgigsd
4) Be in the moment:
At THIS moment you are OK. You are safe. Take one day at a time. One hour or even one breath at a time if you need to.
This tip is about being super-present, not thinking ahead or remembering the past, but practicing BEING. This is a PRACTICE - meaning you will have to do it over and over again - bringing yourself back to the NOW. Over time it gets easier, and it's a great skill to have to take back to "normal" life.
So, when you notice you're worrying, feeling twitchy and want to pick up your device and find out what the "latest" is about the COVID situation, say to yourself, "It's OK. At this moment, I am safe. At this moment I am OK." You can also add or say, "At this moment, my children/husband/family are safe."
EXTRA TIP: Reduce or minimize how often you watch and read the news! And DON'T read or watch the news (or articles about COVID-19 or similar) just before bed!
Distracting ourselves from our fears is a valid technique for feeling better!
Laughter releases helpful chemicals in our bloodstream - Endorphins (our natural "happy" drug) and Dopamine (part of our bodily "reward" system).
What is your favorite comedy shows?
Is there a comedian you like?
Netflix and similar have so many watching options, so find something that makes you laugh!
IMPORTANT: We should NOT use over-use laughter as a distraction technique. And it shouldn't be used for ongoing and persistent fears in regular life. But for a situation like this, where this isn't much that any of us can do other than sit and wait - distraction can be a great coping mechanism.
6) Start a Journal!
If you've always wanted to journal, now is a good time to start. More than just keeping a record of your day, a journal can help you explore and sift through your feelings and experiences and learn from them. It's a great way to get to know you.
It's great to choose a beautiful notebook, but the most important thing is to just get started.
Here are some prompts to get started with:
Today I am feeling _________. I think this is because __________.
One big thing I have learned during this crisis is _________.
I remember the last time I was stuck in the house _________.
One thing that's surprised me recently is _________.
What matters most to me in life is _________.
Describe your ideal day _________.
Today I am grateful for __________.
"A journal is expressive by nature and it contains feelings, emotions, problems, ponderings and it is more reflective on the meaning of life being lived." Lynda Monk
I journal every day before going to bed. This allows me to let go of the negative things that happened throughout the day and celebrate the positive things I experienced. Journaling is a great tool for letting go. Write it down and release it.
7) Be Kind!
Kindness and compassion are some of the most powerful tools any of us have in our toolbox right now. Many of us are largely housebound, never mind the fear that you or a loved one might actually catch the COVID virus! So, of course, we're going to feel unpleasant and weird.
Use kindness to comfort yourself when afraid or feeling anxious or fidgety. Be gentle. Imagine you're soothing a friend, small child, or animal who is afraid - what would you say to them? Then say that to yourself!
Use kindness to give yourself - and others - the benefit of the doubt. Instead of getting upset when you see other people behaving badly, remember that we all do silly things when we're scared.
Imagine you have a kind, wise self. A part of you that is unflappable, intelligent, and unconditionally loves ALL of you. Now, when you need it, imagine that kind, the wise self is with you, supporting you, maybe giving you a hug - and saying exactly what you need to hear (not just the sugary stuff, but also the tough love and common sense).
8) Help Others
Helping others is empowering and makes us feel better. Here are a few ways you could help others.
Check-in on a neighbor or friend and see if they need anything. You can do this by phone, or in person, remembering to maintain a 6 feet distance.
Offer to get someone groceries if you're going.
Help someone less technologically savvy learn how to use Zoom or Facebook or whatever they need to get online.
Host a virtual get-together with your regular friends.
Reconnect more deeply with friends or relatives who have moved away.
9) Live Your Values
When we know your values, we understand what motivates and drives us. When we build our lives around our values, we create a life that is meaningful. Finally, when we align our actions with our values - we're being truly authentic. It's a very satisfying and fulfilling way to live.
And living your values could be the single most important thing any of us can do right now.
Here's an exercise you can do:
List your values on a piece of paper or in your journal.
Give each value a score 0 / 10 as to how well you are living that value in your life now (where 0 is not at all and 10 is full-out).
For the scores that are 8 or more - great!
For the scores that are 7 or less out of 10, ask yourself, "How could I express this value more in my life right now?" "What could I do differently or approach differently, so that I feel good about how I live this value in my life?"
For example, you have a value of creativity, but you're only managing to 'go through the motions' right now and your score is 4/10. Ask yourself how you could be more creative during this time - whether it's cooking, gardening, art or writing, or helping your kids do something creative, or even watching a documentary about someone creative you admire...
"If you don't know your values, now is a great time to learn. I'm offering a free Discovery Session or Good Fit Conversation here. Just click this link https://rb.gy/jgigsd to set this up.
I bet you have some organizational things on your to-do list (like going through winter clothes, sorting out toys to donate or tidying the laundry closet, garage, or shed) that have been on there for a while. Use this isolation period to get them done!
Getting organized and de-cluttering allows us to exert some control over our lives - and therefore feel less helpless! Plus, it'll feel amazing just to have it done.
Organize your closets, your garage, your books, your photos, office, kitchen equipment. Whatever needs organizing.
If you need some inspiration (and great clothes-folding tips) you could watch the Marie Kondo series on Netflix!
A simple 3 Step Method to go through your stuff:
If you're keeping it, be sure to DECIDE where it will "live" from now on.
If you're not keeping it, create two piles:
Things to DUMP
Things to DONATE (and if relevant to pass on to specific people).
When you're done, put each pile into bags or boxes, and then once this crisis is over you can get rid of what you no longer need.
TIP: You don't need to do any of this 'in one sitting', do an hour a day - you'll be surprised how much you get done if you keep it up for a week!
11) Begin a Meditation Practice
Meditation is a practice that has been proven scientifically to calm us, help us be more creative, and be happier (for starters). It's extremely beneficial. There is a lot to learn about meditation - and it's called a Meditation Practice for a reason. But it's also not as hard as it sounds. You can start with as little as 5 minutes a day - and it's good to build a routine, so you meditate at the same time every day. Get a book on "Meditation for Beginners" or go to YouTube or Google and search for "How to Meditate". Another good place to start is "Metta" or "Loving Kindness" meditation. Again, search online and you'll have lots of options to choose from.
It helps to have a quiet space without interruptions - which many of us don't have at the moment. And for some people, trying to meditate when anxious can be stressful. If this is the case, listen to a relaxing guided meditation instead.
Here is a link to a beautiful meditation video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W19PdslW7iw. This is a 15-minute guided meditation to find peace in uncertain times.
So, which of the above ideas resonated with you? The areas I am focusing on are journaling and meditation.
Believe you have the skills and power to tackle this situation and you will! Choose to make the best of a difficult situation and no matter what - you'll find a way to remain centered.
This current and strange COVID-19 situation will end. And when it does, you'll be proud you made the effort to learn something - whether it's about yourself, fresh knowledge, a new skill - and who knows what else!